Looking Forward

As AF's visit comes to a close (please, God), I can't help but think about the future.  It's bittersweet, really.  Once we made the decision to try IVF, I would never have imagined we'd be where we are--attempt #3 for baby #1.  Nevertheless, I know that the next time the wicked witch arrives, I won't be full of dread for the coming days but rather making plans.  Plans to call the RE's office to set things up.  Plans to make sub plans for a few of the coming days for monitoring and a stitch and, eventually, a transfer and a day of bedrest. 

I am a little concerned about how the timing will play out.  I have crunched some numbers (because that's what I do) and if this cycle ends at exactly the same day the last one did, and if my dominant follicle grows at the same rate as it did in our last FET, it would put us having our transfer on a Sunday...a church Sunday...our Homecoming Sunday.  Which I suppose I could deal with (as if I had another choice), but there'd be lots more people with questions than if it was any other day.

But I can't worry about that yet.  It's going to be okay.  I do feel a bit mysterious, not telling anybody.  It's like I'm keeping the world's biggest secret.  Sure, I know that all the people I would normally tell are not as absorbed with my life as I am, but I don't ever want to be so selfish that I think "it's all about me." That is NOT the case, and I'm quite aware of it. 

Now, if I could get my back to stop hurting...must be getting old.  :-)  I woke up this way.  I can walk fine, I'm not stooped over or anything, but I can't seem to get comfortable no matter what I try--walking, standing, sitting, reclining...it all hurts.  That's what happens, I guess, when you're over 30!

Happy weekend, all. 

Hugs and love,