Out with the old...

I can hardly believe 2014 is coming to an end.  It's been a fast year.  In a lot of ways, this year has been a blessing. My brother got married.   I've been permitted to watch my little boy grow and learn and play.  We've experienced a lot of firsts with him this year.  His vocabulary has exploded in the past week or so.  I have heard people talk about how it seems to happen overnight, and now I have witnessed it for myself.

It's also been a tough year in some respects.  An ill-timed family crisis added some stress when I needed to relax, but those directly involved at least seem to be pulling it together now.  

It would probably be disappointing if I said I promise to blog more in 2015.  Well, I suppose only if you hoped I'd blog more.  Nevertheless, let's just say I will still be around-more, I hope-to chronicle my random thoughts and life happenings.

Christmas Eve

Three years ago at this time, I was anxiously waiting for UPS to deliver my blood thinner and quite nervous for the announcement we were about to make.  This Christmas is shaping up to be the most "exciting" one yet, as Lincoln is much more active and expressive than ever.  We don't have much conversational language, but there are definite thoughts being expressed from that little mind.  He reminds me daily to slow down and enjoy the simple things in life.  I'm soaking in all of these moments. For me, they are mommy firsts and, quite possibly, lasts all rolled into one.  I know that the memories we have made this year are for me, as he will remember only through hearing about them (and seeing pictures), but I'm so very thankful for each one.

I'm hyper-emotional this morning for some reason.  I have thought a lot about what "could have been", and perhaps allowing myself one more episode of sadness over the losses of the past year. Later, my family will gather to celebrate this season of love, and tomorrow we will host Christmas dinner at our home for both sides of our family.  While there will be no visible vacancies from last year, which is a blessing by its own right, my heart knows of one.  I don't know why it's hit me so hard this morning.  I thought I was "over it."  That loss was months ago.  I have grieved.  I have mourned.  I have soaked up all the Lincoln I could (is it possible to love a child too much?).  I thought I had moved on with one more memory of "my babies."  

Maybe I will be better after I've had my annual Mello Yello (in memory of my grandmother).  Merry Christmas to anyone reading this.  I hope you have the best one yet.

How's your balance?

Not everyone could "fit" all of these groceries in a bucket.  😉

Slacker

I'm totally slacking on blogging.  I feel bad about that because we have been making memories right and left.   I don't know if it's worth it to backtrack since my blog doesn't have many visitors anymore.  If you're reading this, just know that I'm still here, still infertile, and still thinking about you all.  I'm having a blast trying to keep up with my miracle of a toddler and I'll be around.  More, I hope, but definitely around.  

The great pumpkin

I'm positive that no child has ever had more fun with his Halloween candy than mine.  He has carried that pumpkin around everywhere (and we had meltdowns each time I refused to let him take it to church), and he dumps out the candy...then puts it back in.  Repeat.  The fun never ends!

And hey little acarecrow has his own trick-or-treating style, too...he thought he needed to eat his candy while we were driving to the next house.  Or, as in the picture, before he left the person's house!

Why "Newbies" Shouldn't go to Starbucks on a frosty morning

I had a meeting in the 'big city' yesterday, so I didn't go to school.  I dropped Lincoln off at mom's at normal time, though, and had some time to kill before my meeting started.  I drove the half hour or so and decided I would stop and use a gift card a student gave me two years ago for Teacher Appreciation Week.  

I think I've been to an actual Starbucks once.  Ten years ago.  But I am a Pinterest guru And have made a copycat recipe of their "caramel apple spice" several times.  It is one of my favorite fall/winter treats at home, so I thought I would try the real thing to see how mine compares.

Oh, my goodness!  Someone should open one of these in our tiny little town.  I couldn't even park because of the drive thru line, and cars were trying to enter from about 3 different directions.  I wasn't even sure if the inside was open (no one was going in our out), so I joined the line. I had time, right?

As my turn nears, I panic.  What if I order wrong and sound like an idiot?  The likelihood was increasing.  I picked up my phone and did a quick search, hoping to find a replica of the drive thru menu.  But alas, my turn came before I could find anything useful.  I pulled up, noticing a cardboard sign advertising three featured fall beverages.  Thanks, but not what I'm here for.  A friendly voice piped up, "good morning!  What can I get started for ya?" And that's when I noticed I couldn't see the board.  It was all fogged up.  I instantly had a million questions: do they even have this drink all the time?  Anymore?  And what size is what?  Maybe I should have gone inside...oh, forget it.  I ordered a grande (I remembered it was a size, even if it wasn't what I wanted) salted caramel mocha.  Yep, I saw it on the cardboard sign.  But at least I could read it (and pronounce it), and I knew it was on the menu.

It wasn't bad, but not what I intended to buy.  No worries, though.  I still have enough on my gift card to try the caramel apple spice.  But I think I'll go inside to order.

Random photo dump

So it's been awhile since my last post...nearly 3 weeks.  Sorry!  I'm thinking about you all, though.  It's just that I'm trying to survive toddlerhood and it doesn't leave much time for anything else!  Here's a glimpse into the past 3 weeks at our house...

Lincoln helped me put groceries away.  He pulled out half a box of gloves while making his cereal-box-dominoes.

Not really in a picture-taking mood...

We take our obsessions on the road.  Gotta get those bottles lined up.

Sleep...sleep...sleep.  Let's just say that since converting the crib to a toddler bed, Lincoln's sleep patterns are worse than when he was an infant.  The only difference is, now he comes to is instead of crying in his crib.

Ya gotta train 'em young!

And that's just what I have pictures of.  

Random photo dump

So it's been awhile since my last post...nearly 3 weeks.  Sorry!  I'm thinking about you all, though.  It's just that I'm trying to survive toddlerhood and it doesn't leave much time for anything else!  Here's a glimpse into the past 3 weeks at our house...

Lincoln helped me put groceries away.  He pulled out half a box of gloves while making his cereal-box-dominoes.

Not really in a picture-taking mood...

We take our obsessions on the road.  Gotta get those bottles lined up.

Sleep...sleep...sleep.  Let's just say that since converting the crib to a toddler bed, Lincoln's sleep patterns are worse than when he was an infant.  The only difference is, now he comes to is instead of crying in his crib.

Ya gotta train 'em young!

And that's just what I have pictures of.  

Terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day #467

It has been a day!  Scratch that-it's been a WEEKEND.  I can't seem to get my head above water this schoo year yet, and to top it off, the past two weekends have been so busy that I barely had time to breathe.  And today it has just been one wrong thing after another.  I'm ready to fast forward to next Friday and start a weekend over.  

And what am I doing to correct the things that have gone wrong?  I'm blogging about them so they'll live on forever!  No, I'm not.  I'm not going to rehash them all because there is no blame to place.  It's just been a series of accidents.  No one is injured, and I'm just emotionally distraught because I've been so busy and there's no promise of rest in sight.  I'm frustrated-mostly with myself and my inability to cope with these stressors-but I will survive this, and hopefully be stronger for it.

Lincoln turns 2

Last Satirday was Lincoln's 2nd birthday.  We made a quick stop in Toys R Us on Friday night so he could get his balloon and crown (and to get one more gift).

Lincoln dumped the Cheerios out.  I said he was trying to earn his "birthday whipping."

We had a wedding to attend on Saturday evening, so we invited my parents over for a spaghetti lunch, Lincoln's favorite food.

His party wasn't until Sunday, but we had to open a couple of small gifts today.  Fun-a fishing pole for the tub and a photo album!  One of Lincoln's favorite things to do is look at pictures.

All I wanted was a "good" picture of him in his shirt.  (He has wanted to put it on since we picked it up.)

Loving on Jax

The cake

His friend Annzley sat in his new chair.  So he sat on top of her.

Resting for a minute.  Turning 2 is hard work!

I can't believe my baby is 2!  I certainly wish time would slow down a little!

Moving Along...

J and I have discussed what to do with all of our "stuff" that we likely won't be using again (a.k.a. baby gear).  I can't bear to part with it just yet, but he thinks we should get rid of it - sell it, consign it, donate it, whatever.  I know it is taking up a lot of precious storage space, but I just don't think I can do it.  Not yet.

I cried a lot last weekend, knowing the news that loomed ahead of me following Monday's blood test.  I apologized over and over to J, who asked me why I was so sure it was over, and just allowed myself to be sad.  I cried very little on Monday, but I think it was because I was super busy.  We were at meetings at school beginning at noon followed by open house at 5:30.  By the time I picked Lincoln up and got home, it was nearly bedtime, and J seemed to be fighting some nasal gunk.  He has been sickly all week, and we really haven't had a lot of time to process things together.  I just know I get all emotional when I think or talk about it.  I guess it's just too soon for me.

On another hand, I wish AF would just hurry up and show already.  I had my last PIO injection on Sunday night.  Almost all of the bruises from the blood thinner are gone and the lumps have mostly disappeared from my rear.

Okay, I've got to snap out of this funk.  I can't spend my free time dwelling on this because it is completely out of my control and is in the past.  Move on, Angie.  It will all be okay...

Not yet

I'm sorry if anyone else thought I was done blogging, too.  I'm not.  I will never not write, and this is my space in which to do just that.  So for now, I am still here.  

So what do you do...

...on the day after you find out your family is most likely done growing?  Well, I spent the day with Lincoln soaking up the last day of my summer break.  We went to the movies (there is a $1 kids' movie each Tuesday and Wednesday), then we went to the mall and rode the carousel.  We had lunch at Chik-fil-a and ended with a long nap (for Lincoln) at home.  I guess I'll love him a little harder now and try to make as many memories as I can.  After all, the ones we are building now are for me-he won't remember. But I hope he never doubts my love for him. 

Thanks Jen and Suzanna for your thoughts.  I appreciate your taking the time to comment. This is such a powerful community of supporters.  Maybe it's not as plentiful as it once was-or maybe I'm just out of the loop since I've crossed over-but I will never forget what it was like and I hope my story helps others someday.

And then there were 2...

DISCLAIMER: this is a lengthy post that spans about 3 months.  But it's for me.  I didn't want to post it until they journey was complete (or took a turn).  

April 22, 2014

We have two embryos left.  I just turned 34.  J just turned 41.  We aren't getting any younger.

J and I have decided to attempt our final embryo transfer this summer.  After jumping through a few unexpected hoops, we have an appointment for a consult with our RE to get things started on May 7.  Fingers crossed there aren't too many hurdles.  If all goes well, we're hoping for a July transfer and a spring sibling for Lincoln.

May 7, 2014

Today J and I met with our RE to discuss a summer transfer.  We are planning to proceed with pretty much the same plan as last time.  There is an 85% chance our embryos will survive the thaw (like always).  Statistically, I know this has worked (technically) more times than it should have for me, but I have nothing but hope in my heart.  She did an ultrasound to check the condition of my uterus, but because of the point I was in my cycle, she couldn't see everything she needed to.  I have to go back next week for one more scan and I have to have a few blood tests updated, but we should be good to go with my next cycle and on track for a mid-July transfer.

May 16, 2014

I returned to the RE's office today for a mid-cycle scan.  The ultrasound showed no polyps in my uterus, so we are still on track to begin with my next cycle.  Relieved to dodge this obstacle.

May 28, 2014

Started spotting today.  AF may arrive a couple of days ahead of schedule.  Shouldn't affect the progress of things during the summer, but I sure wouldn't have minded if she'd waited until after the wedding to show up.  Figures...

May 30, 2014

Happy last day of school to me...AF showed up a couple of days early.  So, I put a frantic call in to my nurse before hours to leave her a voicemail since I knew I wouldn't be getting a break today. We are squared away with our plan but I didn't get to line things up with the pharmacy.  The person I was supposed to contact was away from her desk, and I didn't have time to keep trying because of wedding rehearsal.  But it wasn't urgent, so I'll take care of that in Monday.  I start the pill and doxycycline on Sunday.  We're looking at a mid-July transfer.

June 2, 2014

After dealing with a bad connection and a couple of rounds of phone tag, I finally got my meds ordered.  Whew.  It's a relief to have some things finished.  Also scheduled suppression check for 6/24.

June 12, 2014

Meds arrived!  They required a signature, so I made sure to be home all day.  Thankfully, they arrived before lunch time.  I was worried I would miss the FedEx man even though I was home because our doorbell doesn't work.  My insurance covered everything (with a copay) except the PIO.  I was pleasantly surprised.

We leave tomorrow for vacation and first Lupron injection is Saturday.

June 14, 2014

Junkies will shoot up anywhere!  LOL

June 24, 2014

Suppression check = success.  Decrease Lupron to 5 units tomorrow and begin estradiol injections Thursday.  Ultrasound and E2 check 7/7 (our 7th anniversary).  Also, had a trial transfer and will still have to have a stitch put in.  Blech!  Oh, well.  I'll do what I've gotta do.

June 26th, 2014

It's just like riding a bicycle...J gave me my first estradiol valerate injection tonight. Just a drop of blood afterward (I suppose because I'm not on blood thinner yet).  I won't say I missed all these needles, and this cycle is slightly more challenging because we have a toddler.  

July 4, 2014

I'm feeling a bit emotional today.  I don't really know why-nothing significant is happening right now. Next appt isn't until Monday, meaning there are 3 little shots and one big one between now and then. We were driving to town to run errands around lunchtime today and it crossed my mind that within the next two weeks, our final shot at growing our family--short of a science-says-no-but-it-happened-anyway-miracle--will be in the books.  Either it will work or it won't.  And I'll have to figure out how to deal either way.  I teared up.  Not a "good cry," but there were tears.  And then I heard "Say Something" on the radio.  That song chokes me up since I saw the music video.  Yeah, I guess you could say the estrogen is working...

July 7, 2014

Things were great at my appointment today.  Estradiol level is 1,185 (I think) and transfer is scheduled for next Wednesday.  I have instructions for medications and dosing and my Valium prescription ready to fill.  All that's left is the stitch-next Monday.  Blood test is 7/28.  In three weeks, we'll know one way or the other...

July 11, 2014

PIO returned tonight.  Ouch!  I can do this...I can do this...I can do this...

July 14, 2014

Stitch is in place (that was pleasant as always).  Transfer in two days.  Feeling quite anxious about it as I know it is our last one.  Have lots of bending and stretching to do before I can't.  Looks to be a long day tomorrow-cleaning out the guest room...just in case Lincoln will be moving there soon...Bible School at 6:00, and working at school afterward. Lots to keep my mind off things...

July 16, 2014

Transfer is complete!  One of our embryos didn't survive the thaw, which made me kind of sad, but the last one still looked god.  Transfer went as perfectly as possible (thanks to my stellar bladder-filling ability), aside from the clinic running a half-hour behind.  It was no big deal aside from the fact that I had to hold my urine longer.  They have changed their protocol a bit since Lincoln's transfer...I could use the restroom after fifteen minutes of rest if I really needed to instead of an hour (I ended up going 10 minutes before my hour was up) and I only had bed rest for the rest of today.  So now, we wait...

July 17, 2014

Nothing to update today...I just wanted to get a couple of thoughts down before they are forgotten. As the nurse was wheeling me out of NFC yesterday, I was just a little bit sad.  I will never have a reason to enter those doors again.  This place that helped create my miracles.  There is nothing left there for me, and regardless of the outcome of this cycle, it is time for me to leave this place behind.  It is a part of my history.  The enormous chart that bears my name will stop growing as soon as they enter the results of this in a couple of weeks.  

July 21, 2014

Here we are, waiting...5 days past transfer.  I'm trying to remain optimistic, but things haven't exactly been stress-free around here since the transfer.  While it doesn't directly involve us, we've had sort of a family crisis that started on Thursday.  Timing sucks.  

July 23, 2014

I am not hopeful.  I caved and POAS this morning at 7 days post-transfer.  It was negative.  That's the same point we got our positive with Lincoln.  I know it could still just be too early, but my hope is fading.  Beta isn't until Monday.  Gonna retest Saturday and Monday just so I can prepare myself.  

July 26, 2014

HPT at 10 days post transfer = BFN.  I'm sure the results are accurate at this point.  Mondays blood test won't show anything either, I know.  At least I'll be at work and won't get the calls personally.  I won't have to talk to actual people about it.

July 29, 2014

Beta day...and the blood test confirmed what my heart (and my negative hot) already knew.  I'm not pregnant.  Barring any natural miracles, my family is done.  And I'm trying really hard to be okay with that.

And then there were none...

One more week...

I have one more week of summer vacation.  Teachers return to school in my building next Monday.  I love my job-I really do-but I am loving hanging out with Lincoln.  We have had such a fun, albeit short, break to spend together.  I've still got things I need to do to get my classroom ready for Monday's open house, too, so we won't even get to spend the whole week together this week.  I'm hoping I can knock that stuff out in one evening and not have to spend a ton of time there.  Why does time have to pass so quickly?

Wordless Wednesday

On "Us"

A few days ago, I was thinking about this time 7 years prior.  I have a point to make, but as with most of my stories, it will likely not be quickly made.  They rarely are with me.  Because while the shortest distance between two points may, indeed, be a straight line, it is almost never the most scenic route.  

Seven years ago, J and I were about to get married.  As a matter of fact, I was at a wedding three weeks in a row that summer.  The first was that of a former piano student of mine.  She married the son of a lifelong family friend of my parents.  I played the piano for their wedding.  They are now divorced. 

The following week, J's cousin got married.  It was the first time J and I had been to a wedding together, and we had a good time just being spectators.  J introduced me to some of his family who would not get to make it down for our own wedding the following week.  (We understood they couldn't travel so far two weeks in a row.) They are now divorced.

And seven years ago today was our wedding day...everything was perfect, albeit hot!  We are still together and going strong.  Our life has not been perfect, but it was never because we stopped loving each other.  (It was a big day for weddings...I'm curious to know what percentage of those held that day are still together.). So what makes us different? I guess there has to be some good, strong couples thrown in every now and then to balance out the statistics.  

I've always said I was born in the wrong era.  My soul came from a simpler time when folks cared about each other and not just themselves...when doing for others was not seen as some selfless act, but rather just what was expected without praise it recognition...when tough life lessons were learned without fear of legal action.  In a day of participation trophies and egocentric ism, I am truly thankful to have "found him whom my soul loveth" (Song of Solomon 3:4, KJV). 

Happy anniversary, babe.  I can't wait to see what the next chapter of "us" holds.

I remembered...

So I  finally remembered what I was going to write about the other night when I couldn't fall asleep. I will be sure and get it all polished up in the next couple of days.  Right now, Lincoln and I are trying to squeeze every bit of fun we can into what's left of our summer break!

Reflections

Last night when I went to bed, I had trouble falling asleep.  So I "wrote" a blog post in my head.  It was full of wisdom and honesty, and no doubt was one of the most well-written pieces I've produced in quite some time.  Of course, this morning when it got up, I couldn't remember it...I just remember I'd entitled it, "reflections."  Next time, maybe I'll just write when I think it up...

Mirror, mirror

We went on vacation last week, and I totally think I need a mirror like this in my bathroom! 

In 2 Months' time...

Lincoln is 22 months old today.  He'll be 2 in 2 months.  How did this happen? Time, please slow down. Bit spent my whole life waiting to be a mom.  I don't want it to pass me by.

I've tried to make a conscious effort to put the phone down more...turn the tv off...and just soak it all in before it is gone.  I realize how incredible this gift is that I've been given and I want to take in every moment.  I may never get another chance to experience these toddlerisms.

More afflictions

My foot problem turned out to be gout.  Fun stuff.  Leave it to me...

Thankfully, it is well on the way to clearing up.  

New obsession?

Lincoln has moved on from water bottles (except in the tub-they are still history of choice at bath time)...and in to DVD stacking.

He has even figured out that the disc will come out if you push the "button" in the middle. (I expected no less-he's a button pusher from the beginning).

Under the Weather

We have survived our first "major" illness. Lincoln had a minor ear infection at the end of the week.  He has been so healthy, and for that we are so grateful.  He was pretty pitiful for a couple of days, but he seems to be feeling much better now!  I'm glad-sickness is hard on this momma.  I think it's because I'm not used to it-I don't get sick much, either. 

We're hoping he's back 100% in time for uncle Nick's wedding on Saturday!

Counting Down

I don't mean to wish my life away, but there are several "countdowns" going on around here...there are 13 days until my brother's wedding; 8 more days of school (for students); 14 more days of school for me; and only a few  more beyond that until vacation. 

Recently I've contemplated getting my Rank I in LME.  I have always loved books, and I think I would love to foster such a love in children.  I considered it when I did my Master's, but decided to go with literacy instead.  I'm totally happy teaching 5th grade social studies, but would like to expand my options...just in case.  Plus, I can take a class for free for having had a student teacher.  There's a lot going on...we'll see...

Sticky-keyitis

Maybe I've seen too much "Doc McStuffins" lately, but that's what I have diagnosed my piano with.  The cover had been down since the water globe accident, but I pushed it back as I was cleaning today and tried our the keys.  The white keys are fine, but many of the black keys that were covered in the liquid now stick.  No easy fix, either.  Makes me sad.  We got the piano when I was 9 years old and wanted to take lessons.  I've played a lot of pianos in my 25 years of playing, but none of them feel quite like mine.  I've often said I wished I could take my piano with me for all weddings I've played for.  My fingers know "my" keys like they were molded just to fit them.  

I'm trying not to be angry about it.  It was an accident.  I just wish I could put everything breakable out of Lincoln's reach...and still reach it myself!

Ode to Lincoln

I am Lincoln.

I eat with my fingers

I play with water bottles

I am fascinated by objects others call ordinary

I steal momma's cutting board

And use it for a cane

I give hugs

And knee kisses

I hold the phone backwards to my ear and say hello

I act shy to strangers

Then wave to them as they leave

I line things up

My mommy and daddy love me more than life

Because they prayed and suffered for my existence

I can turn a bad day into a good day by sharing giggles

I prefer no shoes

I like bubbles

I take showers

I have a sweet tooth

And I love fruit

And milk

I drink from a straw like a big boy

I might be a big brother some day

If it's God's plan

I love Sunday School

Alvin and the chipmunks cracks me up

I have a temper

I wish my dog would play with me

Sometimes I lay in his bed

It's cozy

I like to push buttons

I see all of my grandparents nearly every day

I am special-

My mommy said so.

Leave it to me...

So I have a mysterious injury...when we got home from the grocery yesterday, I mentioned that my ankle was hurting but I didn't recall Turing or twisting it at all.  As the evening wore on, it got progressively worse.  I even had to take some ibuprofen at 3:20 this morning.  Luckily, the pain eased off a bit and I was able to go back to sleep, but the day has been rough.  I can barely walk.  What gives?   At least j might be sympathetic if I'd actually done something to get hurt.  I guess I'm just getting old...

Busted...

Complicated

That's what everything seems to be these days - complicated.  From major household purchases, to getting the lawn mower going for the year to starting the FET process for our final transfer...nothing has been easy or gone even remotely smoothly this year.  I am bit throwing a pity party, for I know that there are people with true troubles that take more than patience and persistence to fix...but it doesn't make it any less frustrating.

On a more positive note, Lincoln has decided that he loves to pass out hugs and kisses.  He is so stinking cute when he gives hugs-he "pats" your back while he's hugging you.  I suppose because that's what people do to him.  Precious.  I ha a late meeting after school yesterday and didn't get home until around 7:30...he must have missed me because I got LOTS of hugs and kisses last night. And I cherished every single one.

Feeling Emotional

For whatever reason, I've been super emotional the last few days.  I've teared up more times than I can count and J thought I'd lost my mind when I choked back what I could (and carefully wiped away what escaped) when we witnessed the local Child Advocacy Center's "Teddy Bear Run" while running errands today.  (It's a motorcycle ride where all of the riders carry a teddy bear.  The bears are later donated to be distributed to children who have been victims of abuse.). I guess just thinking about the sick, cruel people who could ever harm a child just got to me.  

Yesterday, I was watching Lincoln play and just burst into tears.  Not sure why...u just know I haven't felt this out-of-control of my emotions since we had to leave Jax at home the summer I was pregnant with Lincoln.  (No, I'm not pregnant.) I've gotta get a grip!

Sweet Comfort

I have several friends and acquaintances going through some tough times right now.  I saw a Facebook post by another friend today, and decided to share it here so I'd always have it if I needed to read it.  Maybe somebody reading this could use these words today, too.

"Happy is a person who has friends that pray for her...knowing their prayers reach the Man who can."

Toddler Lesson #487

Pianos don't like broken snow globes.

That is all...

Evil Kenevil, Jr.

At first glance, you might think that this...

...led to this...

...but it did not.  This "bump" was the result of one little boy runnin around too close to the mantle with a blanket over his head.  He didn't even cry-I wouldn't have known what happened if I hadn't witnessed it (and tried to prevent it about 20 times already).  I guess he got my tough genes...

Did you know...?

It's super hard to play the piano with mittens on...

New Tricks

So, we have a new "trick" around here-it appears Lincoln can climb into the coffee rave without any help. 

It's probably worth noting that he also climb up onto our bed unassisted, but I don't have a picture of that.  Oh, boy...I have a feeling the fun is just beginning!

Snow Day!

We are all having a snow day at home today-even J.  Last night, we got about 3 inches of sleet and a couple of inches of snow...and it's still snowing.  Welcome, March.  

We expected school to be closed if the forecast was even close to correct, and after all the ice hit, j and his entire department decided to work from home today.  But the clinic ended up closing altogether for the day.

We hope to take Lincoln out to play later in the snow...after we test it's "walkability" since it covers ice.  And after he wakes up (he's working in 12 hours +.  Poor baby must have been worn out.  I hope it's that and not that he's getting sick.

Stay safe, blog land...hugs and love from me!

Spoiled

Somebody around here sure is spoiled...besides Lincoln!

The Sweetest Kisses

There are lots if types of kisses in the world.  Some are encountered daily...some less frequently.  There are hello/goodbye kisses , passionate kisses, grandma kisses, boo-boo kisses, wick pecks on the cheek, forehead kisses, foot-popping kisses, Hershey's kisses (in a variety of flavors), and most recently added in my world is Lincoln kisses. He has started crawling up in someone's lap (me, dad, grandparents...) and pressing his little lips to theirs.  It us the sweetest thing ever.  Also, it's cute when he "blows kisses."  He puts the back of his hand to his mouth (sometimes*) and makes the "mwah" sound.  

* I say sometimes because you sometimes just get the sound with no action.  That, too, is adorable...but I suppose I'm a bit biased.

I know he will eventually grow up and it will no longer be cool to kiss his momma, so for now I'm just glad to be the first girl to have his  "lovins."

18 month stats

Lincoln had his 18 month checkup on Thursday. He got weighed inthebug boy scales this time.  Current stats are:

Weight-29 pounds

Height-33 inches (best estimate...he's hard to keep still)

Head circumference-49cm

We are as healthy as can be and the best news of all-no more shots until he's 4!

My sweethearts

I spent Valentine's evening eating pizza and cupcakes and having a tickle fight with my two favorite guys.  Here we are camped out on our bed watching Charlie Brown.  

Yep, life is good.

Crisis Averted!

Im happy to report that the cups have been found.  After Lincoln went to bed last night, J and I were brainstorming places we hadn't yet searched, and he remembered Lincoln dropping them behind the couch. They have been recovered, restacked, and are waiting to be played with.

State of Emergency

We are having a crisis at our house...Lincoln's cups are missing.  Not the kind you drink out of...the kind you stack.  

He hasn't missed them yet because we were out of the house most of the day, but tomorrow could get bad...

Thinking about #2

No, not that #2...baby #2.  Since Lincoln was about 6 months old, people have been asking if we were thinking about having another one.  My response is determined by how well I know them (i.e., how much of our "story" they know and how well they understand my sense of humor).  Here are some of my favorite responses:

• sure...although, we "thought" about #1 for many years before he came along.

• oh, we'll just have to see what happens...

• that's easier said than done.

You see, surprises just don't seem to be in the cards for us.  We tried for 3 solid years before making an appointment with the fertility clinic.  I know that's small potatoes to some who tried much longer, but we also weren't super young when we met.  By the time we threw in the towel and resorted to IVF, I was 30. 

In the 18 months since Lincoln was born, I was on the mini pill for about 4 months. It did crazy things to my cycle, so I stopped taking it.  I've been off for a little over a year.  Nothing has happened.  No "oops" for us.  I can't tell you how much I'd just love to make a surprise announcement, but I will never be able to catch anyone off guard with such news.  Everything is so calculated...

We have two embabies left in storage.  One more shot.  We are thinking of trying one last time this summer, so I will probably be setting up a consult in late March or early April.  Likely starting prenatal vitamins again in a couple of weeks (or sooner, if I can remember to buy them).  We thought that by cycling in the summer, I wouldn't have to tell anybody at work what was going on (or explain absences), but it still won't be a surprise to grandparents because I will need a babysitter a few times.

I am hoping to shed a few pounds before then.  I would love to drop about 20, but I could certainly stand to lose more!  I just don't know when I'm supposed to have time to work out!  I'm working on a plan, though.  Hope it works out...

Getting Attached

A certain little boy has become VERY attached to his mommy these days.  After an almost 3 week Christmas break (with a dsay taken off because of no babysitter and a couple of snow days thrown in there), plus 10 more snow days since returning to school, we've spent lots of extra time together.  I think we're both getting spoiled to it. I'm sure going to miss those random snuggles when the weather warms up and I'm working every day!

Fun in the Snow

We don't get a ton of snow, and each winter I wish for one "good" snow to play in.  Sometimes we get one, sometimes we don't.  So far, we haven't had much more than a couple if inches at a time, but it's been SO COLD, we couldn't go out to play.  

This morning, it was a snowy 25 degrees, so we bundled up!

Snow boots, $3.

Time spent bundling up: 20 minutes.  There were tears.

Time spent outside: 10 minutes...all smiles!

Memories made: priceless.

No, he won't remember this first snowy encounter...but we will.

Feeling guilty...

It took me the better part of yesterday to compose a post, because I just wrote for a minute here and there.  And then I decided not to publish it because it made me feel guilty.  Maybe someday....

Thanks for the memories...

Yesterday, I bid adieu to my favorite coffee creamer.  It's the reason I drank coffee (my coffee was the perfect drinkable temperature by the time I got it "doctored up").  A couple of weeks ago, I learned that it had been discontinued.  Panicked, I checked the shelf at Kroger that weekend.  None there.  I wasn't quite out yet, but hated the thought of not having more.  Ever.  

I used up the last bit of it yesterday.  Now I have leftover coffee.  Maybe something new will strike my fancy.  Or better yet, maybe a oracle will happen and they'll bring it back.  Kroger has it's own version of it.  It's okay, but not quite as good (and usually, I'm not a brand snob).  Might just have to make due until I'm out of coffee.