Wednesday, December 16, 2015

It's just a clock...

We bought a new clock.  And I'm having a hard time hanging it.  Not literally (although I'll have to pull out the step ladder). What I'm really struggling with is taking the old one down.  It was one of the first wall decorations J and I chose together for the family room after our house add-on.  It's the clock that fell off the wall and had its glass shattered the morning of my 3rd beta when I was pregnant with Lincoln.  And it's the clock that's been in the background of Lincoln's 3 birthday pictures, marking the precise moment (well, within a few seconds) that he turned 1, 2, and 3.  But it's just a clock.  

I keep hoping that I can convince myself of that if I keep saying it.  That old clock doesn't harbor those memories.  They live within my mind.  And thanks to this blog, I can revisit them any time. So I think the bigger issue here is why am I having such a hard time with change lately?  Maybe just because there seems to be a lot of it this year.

I've been an emotional wreck, and I'm not really sure why.  Lots of other unusual symptoms, too.  Heartburn when I eat, heartburn when I don't eat, slight fatigue (but it is Christmastime and I have a toddler, so go figure), and the "girls" are prematurely tender (it's normal when it's time for AF). I tell ya, if I didn't know any better...well, I might allow myself to wonder "maybe?"


3 comments:

Misty Dawn said...

When is AF due? Anything is possible!! I'm not sure why you are having a hard time with letting go. Remember pictures last forever :) I guess I've never had an issue with it since I'm not that sentimental of a person.....

Charlotte said...

It's all over the blogosphere...the things that happen even though we know better and know there's just no way it could happen. Anything is possible!

Charlotte said...

Thinking of you and missing your voice! Hope all is well!